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Make sure your Partner is warm because
even the most relaxed muscles tighten up when they are cold. Your
own hands must be warm too. If they are naturally smooth and dry there
is no need to use oil or talcum powder, but if either of you is sweaty
this may be helpful.
How To Give Your Partner A Good Massage?
When you begin massage, place your hands
on your partner and wait for a few seconds for you both to
quiet down and so that you can give a message of tranquility and
confidence. It helps if you say silently to
yourself: 'Relax', because then your touch conveys this to your
partner.
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Begin with firm purposeful movements.
They become gentler later. Use the amount of pressure that suits your
partner and the area of the body involved. Someone who is strongly
built will prefer firm, deep massage, but a skinny bony partner will
require sensitive light movements. Too much hurts, too little
exasperates. Ask your partner what pressure is best but after that
discourage any talking because if you ask questions your partner has to
become alert to respond. You are both concerned with feeling rather
than thinking.
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If you are working with alternate
strokes, keep one hand in contact all the time until the other takes
over. Make the final stroke a decisive one and a little slower so
that your partner knows it is the end. Then keep your hands motionless
on the body for a moment while giving your partner time to rest or to
surface gradually. Don't talk briskly until your partner is ready.
Massage Techniques
This kind of massage is not complicated
if you are sensitive to your partner's feelings and will usually give
an extraordinary sense of release from physical and psychological
tension. There are a few people, however, who cannot bear to be
touched. They are usually very tense and wary and at this stage massage
is wasted on them. What should be be exquisitely delightful experience
becomes a nightmare and any touching is abhorrent. In this case, don't
try. They may come to it later when they are more relaxed.
Some people enjoy doing massage to music, especially if something calm
and soothing is chosen. One person's pleasure in music, however, can be
another's poison so it must be a joint choice. As you massage, bear in
mind the two functions:
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The physiological one which helps
circulation, the pressure on the skin emptying the blood vessels and
its release allowing them to fill again;
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Then there is the emotional function,
calming down and a whole body response of relaxation.
Massage Tips
Don't attempt to use massage for medical
conditions which requite expert attention, and never
massage over open or very tender surfaces.
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